darns.

k so aneeways i gots somethin 2 share with u. lemme just copee & paste sum of my kwestions i got on facebook. feel free 2 add moar questions on teh post if u haz my owner as a friend.

Sean: Any relation to the Mortal Kombat character?
Smokey: nah iz not related 2 dat karakter. but u’d be sooprized 2 c how much we getz confoozed. u’z not de furst, even tho u teh first kommenter! yays!

Louis: Are you a cat? If so, can you purr for me? If so, can you do so sexually?
Smokey: oh hai thar. yes i iz kat, tho fillosophicley i might not beh, cuz my existance kan onlee be proved to myself. daykarts FTW! also there iz no sekual purring in teh kat wurld. we just sayz “hey, i thinks u gots mud on ur face” and gets straight 2 teh lickin.

Sarah: how much cooler are you than chris exactly, in exact mathematical percentages? do you have a cat girlfriend? if so, what is her name, and do you plan to make baby kitties with her?
Smokey: i dont liek teh maths, so i cant give u percentagez. catz onlee yoose maths to determine if we haz enuff food or not. either therez “bunches” of food in teh bowl, or “nun”. if “nun”, we go ask teh hoomans fer more. but rest asshured i am way kooler than chris.
i dont haz girlfriend. i haz annoyin little kitteh that botherz meh at my house sometimez. she’z nutz, haz mood swings, stalkin meh all deh times, wants to b mah kitteh friend but doez nothin but annoy and swipe at meh. go figgur.
babie kittehs out of teh question. i can not haz testikles = i can not haz babies.

Louis: How much younger than you is this kitten who annoys you so? May I venture to guess two years?
Smokey: shur u can guessh, but u be teh wrongz. kitteh iz about ten or eleven yearz younger dan meh. there, i use up mah quotah of numbers for teh day. to much thinkin. mebbe i takes nap latah.

that’z just teh first part of it. if u haz owner as friend check out teh post hear & ask me anudder kwestion. if nawt i’ll be postin sum moar latah. but i gots to go gets to sleep.

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